Monday, March 14, 2011

Wow Has it really been 2yrs?

Two years Wow

So how have you been? Life treating you well?

I was feeling a bit conflicted and as far the blog went, I got tired of hearing my own voice. So I took a little break. I never intended it to be a two year hiatus.

I try to explain this because now it seems rather silly.

The sex was great. The communication was open and honest. Somehow during all of this I let doubt creep back in. I started question myself again. When I accepted who I really was and I was given a safe place to let that person out to play. I felt sexy, strong, desired. I was/ I am all those things. Ah but then there was a bit of back sliding somehow guilt and shame worked their way back into my head. Suddenly I didn’t feel so secure. It’s interesting how I could feel safe, sexy and strong while naked and bound to a bed. But fully clothed sitting on the couch on a Sat afternoon could leave me feeling like a freak. So I took a step back and reevaluated the situation. I talked to Sir. I asked myself some questions and dared myself to be completely honest. I am a Submissive Cock slut Wife. I am happiest and at my best giving pleasure to Sir. I’m ok with that. It’ didn’t take me two years to get to this point t but it did take me a while. I found Fetlife to be very useful and welcoming place. While I may not be ready to stand in the middle of my lawn and announce it to the world. I am more comfortable with myself than I have ever been.

So it hasn't all been about the emotional journey there has been a lot of training.

More on the next time